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Suck it, E3: Gamers Vow to Not Pre-Order Games From This Year's Show Until They're Available to Pre-Order

May 12, 2018


As is the case every year, the internet's gaming communities are swearing off pre-orders of the games shown at E3 unless they look really good.


The Electronic Entertainment Expo – the biggest event of the year for the gaming industry and players – is right around the corner and the leaks and rumors have already begun. “We're gonna show developers were sick of of broken promises and day-one DLC,” says Dylan Hallard, already checking GameStop's website to see if the leaked games are available for pre-order. “Unless it's a sequel, remaster, or new IP, I'm not interested,” he continues.


Hallard's friend, Greg Thomas, is also swearing off pre-orders, stating, “I mean, if they show a 30-second teaser of a title, or add a battle royale mode to a game I got bored with over year ago, that's a different story.”


Frustrated gamers online are doing their best to quell the fervent E3 anticipation by posting the same shitty Modern Warfare 2 elevator meme, rallying behind a promise they'll immediately break when the trailers are waved in front of their dumb fucking faces. It's a solid strategy that works none of the time and has changed nothing about how publishers do business.


Members of Reddit – the most popular site for empty threats – have been especially vocal leading up to the event. “I'm really gonna stick it to EA after all those microtransactions with Battlefront,” writes user Garrus_Targaryen in the r/gaming subreddit. “I won't even look at Anthem unless there's a gold version with all the DLC included. That's too good a deal to pass up with Amazon Prime's twenty percent off.”

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