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Dylan's Mom Shocked to Learn She's Had Relations with so Many of His Call of Duty Friends

August 17, 2017

Imagine Mrs. Plaski's surprise when she found out how many of her son Dylan's teammates she's slept with. Where did she even find the time?


Wendy is no stranger to her son's expletive-laced conversations with his friends on the Xbox, but she thought it was all harmless fun until her love life started getting so much attention.


“I came home yesterday afternoon and Dylan was talking to his friends without his headset. He must have thought I was coming home later.” Plaski pauses to collect herself. “The things they were saying...I just...I didn't realize twelve-year-old boys were so sexually active. I thought Call of Duty was about working together and fighting terrorists. That's what Dylan always told me.”


Plaski listened in horror from the doorway as her son's friends described, in graphic detail, all the things they had done to and with her the night before.


“The worst part is that I don't remember any of it,” she laments. “But it sounds like they all had a wonderful time, so I hope Dylan isn't too embarrassed. I just don't know what I'm going to tell his father.”



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